SATIRE: Punjab Plans ‘Ground-To-Earth Day’

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In a move that has left many scratching their heads and others chuckling, Punjab Information Minister Azma Bukhari has proudly declared that her boss, Maryam Nawaz, affectionately known as the “Ground-to-Earth Lady,” is set to unveil a groundbreaking initiative: “Ground-to-Earth Day.”

According to Minister Bukhari, this auspicious occasion will see Maryam Nawaz, scion of the Nawaz dynasty, embark on a grand tour of the earth itself. Yes, you read that correctly. On this day, the esteemed politician will apparently take a stroll around the planet, presumably to connect with the common soil, or perhaps to scout out suitable locations for future political rallies.

“Ground-to-Earth Day will be a momentous occasion for the people of Punjab and beyond,” proclaimed Minister Bukhari, struggling to contain her enthusiasm. “Maryam Nawaz is truly a leader who is in touch with the very ground we walk on, and she is eager to share that connection with the world.”

Details surrounding the logistics of Maryam Nawaz’s global jaunt remain sketchy, with many wondering how exactly one prepares for such an expedition. Will there be a special “Earthwalking” uniform? What kind of footwear is appropriate for traversing continents? And most importantly, who will be responsible for applying copious amounts of sunscreen during this sun-scorched odyssey?

Critics have been quick to criticise the announcement, with some suggesting that Maryam Nawaz might be better solve earthly problems closer to home, such as infrastructure issues or environmental concerns. Others have jokingly said that “Ground-to-Earth Day” could simply be a clever ploy to distract from more pressing political matters.

Regardless of the skepticism, Minister Bukhari insisted that Maryam Nawaz’s planetary pilgrimage will be a resounding success. “This is not just a publicity stunt,” she claimed. “Maryam Nawaz genuinely believes in the importance of connecting with the earth, and she is prepared to go to any lengths to prove it.”

Note: This piece is a satirical work and does not purport to represent the truth.

Malik Ahsan Raza Budh
Malik Ahsan Raza Budh
The writer is a leading satirist.

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